1. Put your hand down. This isn’t a high five – this is Detroit.

DET

2. OK, OK, not literally Detroit but you do know kids who went to Cranbrook.

2

3. You’re the one at the bar always screaming  …

3

4. Even though you were born and raised here:

4

5. You literally climbed mountains to conquer your biggest fears.

5

6. And learned that a chain was only as strong as its weakest link.

whirlyball

7. You couldn’t always get what you wanted … unless you were a Red Wings fan.

7

8. But now it’s time to make a “Michigan Left” back to your childhood.

8

9. Growing up in Metro Detroit, there was no need for a piggy bank; your allowance went straight here:

9

10. And the popcorn there looked like this:

10

11. If you ate too much of it, your mom made you drink one of these:

11

12. And afterwards, your dad drove you to buy your Ace of Base CD here:

12

13.  If that CD was out of stock, you always knew Lisa Lisa had your back.

13

14. And so did Tim “The Toolman” Taylor.

14

15. Mufasa’s death traumatized you at the Americana West.

15

16. Which for some reason is the same spot you failed your first bench press 6 years later.

16

17.  You learned discipline, loyalty and teamwork at your best friend’s 2nd grade birthday party.

PHAZER

18. And refined your artistic talent at Plaster Playhouse.

18

19. OR WAS IT CALLED FUN WITH PLASTER?!?!?!?!

20. Blacking out meant skating through a dark tunnel 100 times.

20

21. You spent endless hours at the “mall.”

21

22. Where everybody knows your name.

22

23.   A guy named Ponce or Fiaz frosted your tips at Mario Max.

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24. Sorry for the late fees (R.I.P).

25

25.  Even if you weren’t popular as a kid, one place made it hip to be square.

26

26. And dessert was always FREE.

27

27. You and your grandpa got matching bee stings here:

28

28. You never met her, but damn it did you respect her.

29

29. Which meant ordering at least one basket of these:

30

30. ALWAYS topped off with a happy ending.

31

31. The two most beautiful words in the English dictionary are “snow” & “day.”

32

32. You’ve said “I think my dad is a member” to get a day pass here:

33

33. And you heard a rumor that someone might have rebounded for Grant Hill here:

34

34. You danced with your best friends …

35

35. And talked behind their backs next door.

36

36. You found love in a hopeless place …

37

37. And then tried to snowball your way into her heart …

38

38. And then just gave up.

39

39. You’re not crazy – the Turner Cup was a BIG deal.

40

40. Their big names brought you in and their low prices brought you back.

41

41. It’s not just a bowling alley — it’s also a “PIZZA PARLOR.”

42

42. But sometimes your crust just needs a little more flavor.

43

43. Those precious hours lost …

44

44. Could have been spent wandering aimlessly here …

45

45. Or defying gravity at the St. Mary’s Fair.

46

46. You’ve driven past the Maple Arts Theatre a thousand times. Never walked in.

47

47. Senior Year meant super soakers, a $200 bill at Toys R’ Us and getting pulled over for speeding.

48

48. Nothing screams “UNDER 21” like a vertical driver’s license.

49

49. But that didn’t stop you from getting wasted at your high school graduation party.

50

50. Which inevitably led you here …

51

51.  Or to here:

52

52. But not everything was all cider & donuts; things in Metro Detroit weren’t exactly perfect.

53

53. You had fears. Fear #1: M.I.P.

54

54. Fear #2: Bringing an out-of-state friend to Leo’s only to hear them say, “OVER-RATED!”

55

55. Fear #3: The Fro.

56

56. Your best bagel place wasn’t even from Michigan.

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57. You put all your hopes and dreams into Thanksgiving only to be rejected by your old high school flame.

58

58. Twice.

59

59. But, hey, at least you can pretend that you’re friends with Jimmy Wolk.

60

60. Instead of “Go Lions!” you had “Fire Millen!”

61.1

61.2

61

61. Downtown had its fair share of problems.

 62

62. Nancy Kerrigan probably won’t be coming back any time soon.

63

63. Moesha and Sister Sister couldn’t even save this network:

64

64. But one place stood the test of time.

65

65. And taught you to be proud of who you are.

66

66. To keep your spirits high.

67

67. To eat your cake one layer at a time.

68

68. To have a mall attached to a mall.

69

69. To interrupt George Blaha while he’s eating lunch.

70

70. Because whether you’re a parent …

71

71. A grandparent ….

72

72. Or still trying to figure things out …

Future 73. Metro Detroit runs in your blood.

74 74. Because what broke our hearts then …

75

75. Taught us to reach for the stars.

76

76. In order to claim our place in history.

77

– The Original Husky Boys –

OriginalHuskyBoys@gmail.com

88 thoughts on “76 WAYS TO TELL YOU’RE FROM DETROIT (AND BY DETROIT WE REALLY MEAN THE SUBURBS)

    • I was waiting to see to see Farrell’s on the list too,how could they leave them off???? I wish they were still around .Good times !!!

  1. Well done – Bonaventure, Tally Hall, Adventure Center, 7-11, Old Orchard Theater, Crosswinds Mall goes indoor then outdoor again, NFWB baseball, Lakes Area Soccer

  2. Yes ! Tally Hall ! Miss that place. .there was a Hibachi Japanese restaurant next to it too. And the driving range across the street where whole foods is now.
    -Sweet Dreams?
    -Cruising up n down orchard lk during summer evenings
    -Chaldeans
    -Stage Deli
    -Farmer Jacks
    -Big Boys
    -Leaps and Bounds
    -Unos

    Otherwise..this was perfect

  3. Think I left before some of these places even existed let alone became memories. I’d like to see someone do this but with those places that are part of the collective memory of those of us who grew up in the 50s, 60s and 70s which means Motown, Briggs Stadium, Lafayette Coney, cruising Woodward and much more.

      • မမ ရစ တ မဆင ရ စခ င ပ ဘ ဖတ ရတ စ တ မ က င ဘ မမ မ ပ န ဘ က စ လ ဖတ တ သ တ တ င အ ဒ က န မန တ ဖတ ရတ ရင စ တ ထ မ မ သ တ ပ ဘ ဖစ လ လ ဆ တ အ မင မတ ရင တ င စ တ စတန သန သန န အ က ပ ထ တ စ မ မဟ တ လ ပ မ က က ပ င ခ င ရ ပ တယ ၀ဖန လ လ ရပ သ တယ ဒ ပမ စ က ပ င ခ င တ မရ ဘ ထင မ တယ ဘ လ ဆ တ ၀ သန ပ လ ရ ကတ မ ဒ မ ရ သင တယ ဒ မ မ က င တ ဆ တ လ တဥ ခ င စ န ဆ င တ ခ ယ ခ က ပ ပ စ ဖတ သ ရ ခ ယ ဖတ ပ င ခ င အခ င အ ရ တခ ပ က ယ မ က က ရင မဖတ ရ ဒ က င ဘ လ ရ သ က လ တ လပ စ ရ ခ င ပ စခ င ပ တယ ဘယ သ မ pcerfet မ ဖစ င ပ ဘ pcerfet ဖစ ဖ လ ဘ လ ရ နတယ မထင မ ဘ လ တ လပ စ ရ သ ခ င ရ နတ အ ခအ န လ က မညစ မ စခ င ပ ဘ လ မမ ပ ရ င စ စ ဆက ရ င ပ စ ခ စ သ ခ သင

  4. I was born at Pontiac General in 1953. Lived in West Acres Subdivision in Orchard Lake. Went to Our Lady of Refuge. Dad owned a grocery store in Keego Harbor where a huge painting of VERNORS was painted on the side of the building. I remember stopping at the Cider Mill on our way to Grandparents home in Dearborn and how I was so scared to stand close to the cider wheel because I thought it was GIGANTIC!! I remember going to Dearfield Village with my dear Aunt Nina and to the the Ford Factory to watch cars being built. My fondest memories was of our subdivision (WestAcres) and our neighborhood clubhouse and the lagoon freezing over in the winter where kids could ice skate and sledding down the big hill on our togoggan built for all 7 of my siblings and my daddy with our Boxer dog, Topsy running along side of it… I also loved walking down the gravel covered steps made from old railroad ties to the lake where we had the best beach and floating dock with a high-dive and the awesome slide that went right into the water… Orchard Lake… the best place to bring up a family back in the 50’s! Oh how I miss those good ol’ days.

    • I like your comments. More visceral and direct than most of these noted experiences and recollections. Your thoughts are not the same as listing malls and delis and arcades. Kudos! I also went to Our Lady of Refuge. Back when. Maybe we passed on a Sunday? I spent a lot of time in Keego, right across from the actual “Harbor.” Lived in an apartment there for a year. Hung time with friends in the dives. Boney Maronies? I think I remember that Vernor’s sign. The bowling alley was my “bike to the arcade” spot. And always ice cream at DQ or Richardson’s on a hot day. Best to you.

    • OH YES. I was there for the very first one. You’ll just have to find someone who will take the time to explain.

    • I remember the day the Sherriffs evicted the ACE hardware store at what became Crosswinds Mall when it was roofed-over. The entire contents of the store was festooned across the sidewalk spilling into the parking lot.

  5. Been gone a long time…made me laugh..remember it all.Tally Hall did not make the list…stage deli ,sure I could think of lots more but fun…

  6. The blizzard of ’74, Billy Sims, Mitch Ryder, sitting on the hill at Pine Knob while enjoying great music with libations brought from home, muscle cars!

    • Pine Knob represents some of the best moments in my life with the best friends in my life. Should have made this list!

    • Bloomfield Charlies is just an empty vacant hole in the wall. I bussed tables there once upon a time. It has been so many things over the years; nothing sticks. I don’t understand why they can not put a lucrative restaurant in there!

  7. I remember when Langan’s was Little Caesars! Skating at Bonadventure’s… Walking around Tally Hall… getting pecked in the back of the head by a bird protecting what was once a dirt lot next to the McDonalds by Americana West… Waiting forever as a kid for my mom to pick up my sister and I from Old Orchard Theater… Getting a corsage at English Gardens for prom… Orchard Lake Rd when it was only two lanes wide between Northwestern Highway and the high school… and when the tornado cut across Orchard and Maple, and some neighborhoods near it. Then it threw a pick-up w/ camper into the bank. THAT should’ve been on the list.

    • I remember that tornado! I watched that camper get picked up and dropped through the bank roof. Terrifying! What was that ….1977?

      • 1976 I was a senior at WBHS that year. I remember the Winebago through the window at Belle Tire.

      • It was March 20th 1978, I know because our house was hit by it.
        We lived off 14 Mile Rd just east of Drake Rd….we were hit before it travelled over to Maple Rd area…..something I will never forget!!

    • Americana West! I remember driving there with my mother. Eating popcorn. Probably saw Alien or Terminator. She was good to me about that stuff and tolerant of my needs.

      PS. Tornadoes sucked!

  8. What about Captian Cosmos Arcade? Schulers Restaurant, the Drake House, Buggy Works Restaurant for a 10 scoop bowl of ice cream, The farm stand across the road from Schulers on Farmington Rd, Adventure Day Camp through W.B. parks and recreation, The VP Lounge (The Village Place), Pine Knob Music Theater, getting Fago pop in Kego Harbor, Maria’s pizzeria, The Harbor Bar (with the large black stuffed bear), Steak n Ale, Sign of the Beefcarver, Bricker Tunis Furs, Marmel (where we would go to enrich our sticker collections), Wacky Packs, The Pancake House and the Cornucopia (just on the corner in front of where English Gardens is now), Buddies pizzeria, Cromwell Pools, Effros Drugstore (which is still there!), Crate and Barrel in Orchard Place Mall, Diamond Bakery, Scoops Ice Cream, Cinderella’s Castle (girls dress store), the beautiful FARM at the corner of Walnut and Orchard Lake (which is a lovely new temple-can you believe there were ever farms there?), Shenandoah Golf Course, the public library was the building now called the Hadessa House (it is nearly across from the high school), West Bloomfield High School as ONE floor, not two!, the rude comments on WRIF in the morning during the snowstorm of 1977 about how the students in West Bloomfield public schools just “couldn’t get their limousines started” because the weather was too cold, the fact that we had to listen to the radio to see if we had a school closing!, the Saint Mary’s Fair with Polish dancing, the Doherty summer carnival, the WBHS radio station, the pink polka dotted baseball dugout (senior prank of 86-88?), Vaudeville, Wesley Berry Florist, Franklin Racquetball Club, and The Courthouse Tennis and Racquetball Club?

  9. I’m nearly 35 years old and haven’t heard of more than half of these things. Plus, I moved 20 times around the Metro-Detroit area. So, this list is quite subjective.

    • Yeah. I agree. To paraphrase… As I said in a previous post, you bring your own memories to this arcade. Your good is my forgotten. My good might be your remember when.

  10. You know while I know a lot of the place you show and what not I am from down rived namely inkster. So the north of Detroit rich boy places don’t mean as much to me as say a zap zone, or a satelits bowl or a layfayette Coney or fairlane mall or a skate land west. You know

    • Oh we know those spots. Been there. We all went to Coney or Inkster or Fairlane. And not everyone from “those places” fits into your perspective. But we are all from Michigan. The good, bad, and ugly. Diversity.

  11. You guy’s are so young — how about the Tonsorial Parlor where northwestern ended and you turned left on 14 mile and down to Haggerty and Roy’s Ranch and there’s the Walled Lake Casino and Crystal Pool and Northland before it was enclosed. Top that.

  12. this has nothing to do with Detroit. this is what its like to be a upper class jew living in westbloomfeild. i am seriously so ashamed of the ignorant person who created this. have you ever even been to detroit? no i dont think so, to busy eating 7-layer cake at Dakota bread ? you over privileged fuck.

    • You are so messed in the head. Disgusting. Look at the demographics for West Bloomfield in the 70s 80s 90s. Not what you think in that feeble brain of yours. Jews, Chaldeans, Middle-Easterns, Christians, Catholics, Blacks, etc. Race, ethnicity, and religion diversity. Just to type out a few for your “name-calling.” Please just respect that this blog is one person’s view of their life growing up in the suburbs. Not for you.

      • At least the part of West Bloomfield that i live in, especially my neighborhood, The only people that seem to be left are Jews, Blacks, and Chaldean. Are there any anglo saxons left in the city? haha.

  13. The Family Buggy. Tally Hall. Old Orchard Theater. West Bloomfield wasn’t the only suburb out there, what about Farmington Hills?

  14. this list is specific and really stupid, not everybody who says their from Detroit is from the suburbs. Cmon West Bloomfield, and a lot of these places you cant even recognize unless you grew up in Oakland County. The author of this is not a Detroiter, but a person with a lack of a life and too much time to write silly stuff!!

    • I said it previously. I’ll say it again. This is one person’s perspective on growing up in Michigan.
      Not your experience.
      Write your own!

    • My mother worked right down there at JLH. She tells me about it all of the time. Really old school memories. Thanks for mentioning it!

    • And where are you from? Michigan is a big place. Detroit sprawls.

      Write your own. This person did it. Tell us about your experiences!

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